Thursday, December 11, 2008

New Hobbies

I think I'm going to take up a few hobbies, say for instance, cliff diving or grizzly goosing. Something a little exciting, perhaps crocodile teasing, or explosive ordnance disposal while intoxicated ( perhaps the only way to do that and not blow an artery), maybe just motorcycle racing with out a helmet.

I don't really have a death wish, but I did go to a Christmas dinner at the "Assisted Living" facility where my mother in law is incarcerated.

Locks on the doors, to keep the little dears from wandering off, a very high ratio of care givers (most of whom I expect to become alcoholics, I would) and a lot of artificial high spirits.

The music was provided by an ancient rocker with the most amazingly preserved hair color. He was ten years older than me, with not a strand of grey. How does he do that? Super Glue, perhaps, only his hair professional knows for sure.

The food was excellent, beef you could eat with a straw, crab cakes, shrimp, and stuffed mushrooms. Nothing that required teeth to chew, you could easily gum the stuff into submission, and they did.

Wine was offered, I begged for a full bottle, to divert my thoughts.

I've never seen so many walkers outside of a Hollywood Florida mall. They were lined up like assault vehicles at a Mayday Parade in Moscow.

The Christmas Carols were rendered in a voice that may have been strong once, but broke all too often now. Betty, who sat across from us, sang along in a beautiful little girl voice, that hasn't belonged in a little girl for a tragically long time. I saw a little old lady cry when she was told to eat her dessert. I saw too many people, who were at one time, strong parents and spouses, and providers.

Now the lights are on and nobody's home. This was the first time I've seen my mother in law without makeup or her hair done. That's a real sign of how far she has gone from here. There were way too many empty vessels.

Then you see the secret glances, you look at their eyes, and see that some are not gone, but only hiding.

Excuse me I have to go write my name on some bullets.

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