Saturday, June 30, 2007

Cryptic Dragon,,,,,,Teddy Kennedy

Teddy Kennedy is a parody of a human creature. He is physically repellent, incomparably arrogant, demonstrably criminal, at his best he is an alcoholic blowhard. How the He!! can any responsible person vote for this scum? He has been caught, and photographed doing things that would end the career of any other political figure, yet we still have to endure his presence.


More than this, what motivates this animated pile of suet to sell out the country that made his bootlegger father rich? He and his entire family are living off the gut pile created by his father in the Twenties. None of them, by their own admission have ever worked at anything. What twisted mental perversion allows these parasites to believe they are qualified to guide the course of this great nation? None of the living Kennedys have ever served this country.

The motivation can't be money, the entire family is rich enough to never have to work. They have supported murderous cousins overseas, to avoid trial. It can't be the betterment of the nation, the communist bastard has tried to give away every thing we hold dear. It shouldn't be power, Mary Jo gave her life unwillingly to end his bid to be President. I can't imagine the debacle that would have been, and I have quite the imagination.

If you can enlighten me please do. It won't ease my mind, 'cause this A$$hole will only stop when he dies. I am not advocating anyone rush to assist with that, God will call him to judgement at the right time. This creature is evil, he shows us day to day, that he is evil.

I just don't know why.

The twenty loop holes.

This is the site of a US Senator who has let the RAT outta the sack.

20 Loopholes in the Senate Immigration Bill

Loophole 1 – Legal Status Before Enforcement:

Amnesty benefits do not wait for the “enforcement trigger.” After filing an application and waiting 24 hours, illegal aliens will receive full “probationary benefits,” complete with the ability to legally live and work in the U.S., travel outside of the U.S. and return, and their own social security card. Astonishingly, if the trigger is never met and amnesty applications are therefore never “approved,” the probationary benefits granted to the illegal alien population never expire, and the new social security cards issued to the illegal alien population are not revoked. [See pp. 1, 290-291, & 315].

Loophole 2 – U.S. VISIT Exit Not In Trigger:

The “enforcement trigger,” required to be met before the new temporary worker program begins, does not require that the exit portion of U.S. VISIT system – the biometric border check-in/check-out system first required by Congress in 1996 that is already well past its already postponed 2005 implementation due date – to be in place before new worker or amnesty programs begin. Without the U.S. VISIT exit portion, the U.S. has no method to ensure that workers (or their visiting families) do not overstay their visas. Our current illegal population contains 4 to 5.5 million visa overstays, therefore, we know that the U.S. VISIT exit component is key to a successful new temporary worker program. [See pp. 1-2].

Loophole 3 – Trigger Requires No More Agents, Beds, or Fencing Than Current Law:

The “enforcement trigger” does not require the Department of Homeland Security to have detention space sufficient to end “catch and release” at the border and in the interior. Even after the adoption of amendment 1172, the trigger merely requires the addition of 4,000 detention beds, bringing DHS to a 31,500 bed capacity. This is far short of the 43,000 beds required under current law to be in place by the end of 2007, or the additional 20,000 beds required later in the bill. Additionally, the bill establishes a “catch, pay, and release” program. This policy will benefit illegal aliens from countries other than Mexico that are caught at the border, then can post a $5,000 bond, be released and never show up for deportation hearings. Annual failure to appear rates for 2005 and 2006, caused in part by lack of detention space, doubled the 2004 rate (106,000 – 110,000 compared with 54,000). Claims that the bill “expands fencing” are inaccurate. The bill only requires 370 miles of fencing to be completed, while current law already mandates that more than 700 miles be constructed [See pp. 1-2, & 10-11, and EOIR’s FY2006 Statistical Yearbook, p. H2, and The Secure Fence Act of 2004].

Loophole 4 -- Three Additional Years Worth of Illegal Aliens Granted Status, Treated Preferentially To Legal Filers:

Aliens who broke into the country illegally a mere 5 months ago, are treated better than foreign nationals who legally applied to come to the U.S. more than two years ago. Aliens who can prove they were illegally in the U.S. on January 1, 2007, are immediately eligible to apply from inside the U.S. for amnesty benefits, while foreign nationals that filed applications to come to the U.S. after May 1, 2005 must start the application process over again from their home countries. Last year’s bill required illegal aliens to have been here before January 7, 2004 to qualify for permanent legal status. [See pp. 263, 282, & 306].

Loophole 5 – Completion of Background Checks Not Required For Probationary Legal Status:

Legal status must be granted to illegal aliens 24 hours after they file an application, even if the aliens have not yet “passed all appropriate background checks.” (Last year’s bill gave DHS 90 days to check an alien’s background before any status was granted). No legal status should be given to any illegal alien until all appropriate background checks are complete. [See pp. 290].

Loophole 6 – Some Child Molesters Are Still Eligible:

Some aggravated felons – those who have sexually abused a minor – are eligible for amnesty. A child molester who committed the crime before the bill is enacted is not barred from getting amnesty if their conviction document omitted the age of the victim. The bill corrects this loophole for future child molesters, but does not close the loophole for current or past convictions. [See p. 47: 30-33, & p. 48: 1-2]

Loophole 7 – Terrorism Connections Allowed, Good Moral Character Not Required:

Illegal aliens with terrorism connections are not barred from getting amnesty. An illegal alien seeking most immigration benefits must show “good moral character.” Last year’s bill specifically barred aliens with terrorism connections from having “good moral character” and being eligible for amnesty. This year’s bill does neither. Additionally, bill drafters ignored the Administration’s request that changes be made to the asylum, cancellation of removal, and withholding of removal statutes in order to prevent aliens with terrorist connections from receiving relief. [Compare §204 in S. 2611 from the 109th Congress with missing §204 on p. 48 of S.A. 1150, & see missing subsection (5) on p. 287 of S.A. 1150].

Loophole 8 – Gang Members Are Eligible:

Instead of ensuring that members of violent gangs such as MS 13 are deported after coming out of the shadows to apply for amnesty, the bill will allow violent gang members to get amnesty as long as they “renounce” their gang membership on their application. [See p. 289: 34-36].

Loophole 9 – Absconders Are Eligible:

Aliens who have already had their day in court – those subject to final orders of removal, voluntary departure orders, or reinstatement of their final orders of removal – are eligible for amnesty under the bill. The same is true for aliens who have made a false claim to citizenship or engaged in document fraud. More than 636,000 alien fugitives could be covered by this loophole. [See p. 285:19-22 which waives the following inadmissibility grounds: failure to attend a removal proceeding; final orders of removal for alien smuggling; aliens unlawfully present after previous immigration violations or deportation orders; and aliens previously removed. This appears to conflict with language on p. 283:40-41. When a direct conflict appears in a statute, the statue is interpreted by the courts to the benefit of the alien.].

Loophole 10 – Learning English Not Required For A Decade:

Illegal aliens are not required to demonstrate any proficiency in English for more than a decade after they are granted amnesty. Learning English is not required for an illegal alien to receive probationary benefits, the first 4-year Z visa, or the second 4-year Z visa. The first Z visa renewal (the second 4-year Z visa) requires only that the alien demonstrate an “attempt” to learn English by being “on a waiting list for English classes.” Passing a basic English test is required only for a second Z visa renewal (the third 4-year Z visa), and even then the alien only has to pass the test “prior to the expiration of the second extension of Z status” (12 years down the road). [See pp. 295-296].

Loophole 11 – Earned Income Tax Credit Will Cost Taxpayers Billions In Just 10 Years:

Current illegal aliens and new guest workers will be eligible for the Earned Income Tax Credit, a refundable tax credit designed to encourage American citizens and legal permanent residents to work. The Congressional Budget Office estimates that this loophole will cost the U.S. taxpayer up to $20 billion dollars in just the first 10 years after the bill’s enactment. To be consistent with the intent of the 1996 welfare reforms – which limited new immigrants from receiving public benefits until they had been legal permanent residents for five years – the bill should withhold EITC eligibility from amnestied aliens until they become legal permanent residents. Closing this loophole will save the taxpayers billions of dollars. [See p. 293 after S.A. 1190 was adopted, p. 307, p. 315, §606. All that is required for EITC eligibility is a social security number and resident alien status. Nothing in the bill’s tax provisions limit EITC eligibility. The issuance of social security numbers to aliens as soon as they apply for amnesty will ensure they are able to qualify for the EITC.]

Loophole 12 – Affidavits From Friends Accepted As Evidence:

Records from day-labor centers, labor unions, and “sworn declarations” from any non-relative (acquaintances, friends, coworkers, etc) are to be accepted as evidence that the illegal alien has satisfied the bill’s amnesty requirements. This low burden of proof will invite fraud and more illegal immigration – even aliens who are not yet in the U.S. will likely meet this burden of proof. DHS will not have the resources to examine whether the claims contained in the “sworn declarations” of the alien’s friends (that the alien was here prior to January 1, 2007 and is currently employed) are actually valid. [See p. 293: 13-16].

Loophole 13 – Taxpayer Funded Legal Counsel and Arbitration:

Free legal counsel and the fees and expenses of arbitrators will be provided to aliens that have been working illegally in agriculture. The U.S. taxpayer will fund the attorneys that help these individuals fill out their amnesty applications. Additionally, if these individuals have a dispute with their employer over whether they were fired for “just cause,” DHS will “pay the fee and expenses of the arbitrator.” [See p. 339:37-41, & p. 332: 37-38.]

Loophole 14 – In-State Tuition and Student Loans:

In-state tuition and other higher education benefits, such as Stafford Loans, will be made available to current illegal aliens that are granted initial “probationary” status, even if the same in-state tuition rates are not offered to all U.S. citizens. This would normally violate current law (8 U.S.C. §1623) which mandates that educational institutions give citizens the same postsecondary education benefits they offer to illegal aliens. [See p. 321: 8-31].

Loophole 15 – Inadequacy of the Merit System:

The “merit system,” designed to shift the U.S. green card distribution system to attract higher skilled workers that benefit the national interest, is only a shell of what it should have been. Though the merit system begins immediately, it will not increase the percentage of high skilled immigrants coming to the United States until 2016, 8 years after enactment. Of the 247,000 green cards dedicated to the merit based system each year for the first 5 years, 100,000 green cards will be reserved for low-skilled guest workers (10,000) and for clearing the current employment based green card backlog (90,000). From 2013 to 2015, the number of merit based green cards drops to 140,000, and of that number, 100,000 green cards are still reserved each year for low-skilled guest workers (10,000) and for clearing the current employment based green card backlog (90,000). Even after 2015, when the merit system really begins (in 2016) by having 380,000 green cards annually, 10,00 green cards will be reserved specifically for low skilled workers, and points will be given for many characteristics that are not considered “high-skilled.” For example, 16 points will be given for aliens in “high demand occupations” which includes janitors, maids, food preparation workers, and groundskeepers. [See p.260: 25 – p. 261: 20, p. 262, & The Department of Labor’s list of “occupations with the largest job growth” available at].

Loophole 16 – Visas For Individuals That Plan To Overstay:

The new “parent” visa contained in the bill which allows parents of citizens, and the spouses and children of new temporary workers, to visit a worker in the United States is not only a misnomer, but also an invitation for high rates of visa overstays. This new visa specifically allows the spouse and children of new temporary workers who intend to abandon their residence in a foreign country, to qualify to come to the U.S. to “visit.” The visa requires only a $1,000 bond, which will be forfeited when, not if, family members of new temporary workers decide to overstay their 30 day visit. Workers should travel to their home countries to visit their families, not the other way around. [See p. 277:1 – 33, and p. 276: 38-43].

Loophole 17 – Chain Migration Tippled Before Being Eliminated:

Though the bill will eventually eliminate chain migration (relatives other than spouses and children of citizens and legal permanent residents), it will not have full effect until 2016. Until then, chain migration into the U.S. will actually triple, from approximately 138,000 chain migrants a year (equal to 14% of the 1 million green cards the U.S. currently distributes on an annual basis) to approximately 440,000 chain migrants a year (equal to 45% of the 1 million green cards the U.S. currently distributes on an annual basis). [See pp. 260:13, p. 270: 29 – pp. 271: 17]

Loophole 18 – Back Taxes Not Required:

Last year’s bill required illegal aliens to prove they had paid three of their last five years of taxes to get amnesty. This year, payment of back taxes is not required for amnesty. The bill requires taxes to be paid at the time of application for a green card, but at that time, only proof of payment of Federal taxes (not state and local) is required for the years the alien worked on a Z visa, not the years the alien has already worked illegally in the United States. Though Senator McCain’s S.A. 1190, adopted by voice vote, claimed to “require undocumented immigrants receiving legal status to pay owed back taxes,” the amendment actually only required proof of payment of taxes for “any year during the period of employment required by subparagraph (D)(i).” Since the bill does not contain a subparagraph (D)(i), nor require any past years of employment as a prerequisite for amnesty, the amendment essentially only requires proof of payment of taxes for future work in the U.S., not payment of “back taxes.” [See p. 307, and p. 293 as altered by S.A. 1190, amendment p. 2: 19-20.]

Loophole 19 – Social Security Credits Allowed For Some Illegal Work Histories:

Aliens who came to the U.S. on legal visas, but overstayed their visas and have been working in the U.S. for years, as well as illegal aliens who apply for Z visa status but do not qualify, will be able to collect social security credits for the years they worked illegally. Under the bill, if an alien was ever issued a social security account number – all work-authorized aliens who originally came on legal visas receive these – the alien will receive Social Security credits for any “quarters of coverage” the alien worked after receiving their social security account number. Because the bill requires social security account numbers to be issued “promptly” to illegal aliens as soon as they are granted “any probationary benefits based upon application [for Z status]” (these benefits are granted 24 hours after the application is filed), an illegal alien who is denied Z visa status but continues to work illegally in the U.S. will accumulate Social Security credits. [See pp. 316:8 – 16, and pp. 315: 32-39]

Loophole 20 – Criminal Fines Not Proportional To Conduct:

The criminal fines an illegal alien is required to pay to receive amnesty are less than the bill’s criminal fines for paperwork violations committed by U.S. citizens, and can be paid by installment. Under the bill, an illegal alien must pay a $1,000 criminal fine to apply for a Z visa, and a $4,000 fine to apply for a green card. Eighty percent of those fines can be paid on an installment plan. Under the bill’s confidentiality provisions, someone who improperly handles or uses information on an alien’s amnesty application can be fined $10,000. Administration officials suggest that the bill’s “criminal fines are proportionate to the criminal conduct.” Why, then, is the fine for illegally entering, using false documents to work, and live one-tenth the fine for a paperwork violation committed by a government official? [See p. 287: 34, p. 317: 9, p. 315:6-8, & remarks made by Secretary Gutierrez on Your World with Neil Cavuto, 4:00 May 31, 2007]

The roll of shame.

Per Commenter question.
I'm sorry for the oversight, I felt there was only one bill to comment on, I'M probably wrong. These are the votes for cloture on the Immigration Reform Bill (Shamnesty). Bad would be where the Kennedy name falls.
Final who’s who of the votes when it is available
The Roll of Shame.

YEAs ---64
Akaka (D-HI)
Bennett (R-UT)
Biden (D-DE)
Bingaman (D-NM)
Bond (R-MO)
Boxer (D-CA)
Brown (D-OH)
Brownback (R-KS)
Burr (R-NC)
Cantwell (D-WA)
Cardin (D-MD)
Carper (D-DE)
Casey (D-PA)
Clinton (D-NY)
Coleman (R-MN)
Collins (R-ME)
Conrad (D-ND)
Craig (R-ID)
Dodd (D-CT)
Domenici (R-NM)
Durbin (D-IL)
Ensign (R-NV)
Feingold (D-WI)
Feinstein (D-CA)
Graham (R-SC)
Gregg (R-NH)
Hagel (R-NE)
Harkin (D-IA)
Inouye (D-HI)
Kennedy (D-MA)
Kerry (D-MA)
Klobuchar (D-MN)
Kohl (D-WI)
Kyl (R-AZ)
Lautenberg (D-NJ)
Leahy (D-VT)
Levin (D-MI)
Lieberman (ID-CT)
Lincoln (D-AR)
Lott (R-MS)
Lugar (R-IN)
Martinez (R-FL)
McCain (R-AZ)
McConnell (R-KY)
Menendez (D-NJ)
Mikulski (D-MD)
Murkowski (R-AK)
Murray (D-WA)
Nelson (D-FL)
Nelson (D-NE)
Obama (D-IL)
Pryor (D-AR)
Reed (D-RI)
Reid (D-NV)
Salazar (D-CO)
Schumer (D-NY)
Snowe (R-ME)
Specter (R-PA)
Stevens (R-AK)
Voinovich (R-OH)
Warner (R-VA)
Webb (D-VA)
Whitehouse (D-RI)
Wyden (D-OR)

NAYs ---35
Alexander (R-TN)
Allard (R-CO)
Barrasso (R-WY)
Baucus (D-MT)
Bayh (D-IN)
Bunning (R-KY)
Byrd (D-WV)
Chambliss (R-GA)
Coburn (R-OK)
Cochran (R-MS)
Corker (R-TN)
Cornyn (R-TX)
Crapo (R-ID)
DeMint (R-SC)
Dole (R-NC)
Dorgan (D-ND)
Enzi (R-WY)
Grassley (R-IA)
Hatch (R-UT)
Hutchison (R-TX)
Inhofe (R-OK)
Isakson (R-GA)
Landrieu (D-LA)
McCaskill (D-MO)
Roberts (R-KS)
Rockefeller (D-WV)
Sanders (I-VT)
Sessions (R-AL)
Shelby (R-AL)
Smith (R-OR)
Stabenow (D-MI)
Sununu (R-NH)
Tester (D-MT)
Thune (R-SD)
Vitter (R-LA)

The Yeas are the sellouts who would destroy our country. Mark them well.

Friday, June 29, 2007

Road Trip

Peeps, I am feeling a road trip.

One of the things I used to do for a living was drive a truck. I was never an over the road, long haul type. I drove a 35 ft long straight truck with 12 ft behind the rear axle. It was 13 and half feet high, with a deck out to the front bumper. That is the maximum size for a single axle truck. I delivered furniture to every hole in the wall and mud hole in four states.

Our "sales man" was apparently scared to go to a town that didn't have a "town square". He would drive to some hog wallow with a city limits sign (usually both on one post), drive around the square and sell a suit or two. Then it was off to the next mom and pop store to sell another one. The end result is a lot of stops and a long day when delivering the load.

A typical day would see me at the shop building furniture or loading the truck until about 1530. I would drive the truck home, have dinner with the family, get cleaned up grab my books and take the truck to school. I would be in class until 2200 and then drive way the heck to some where at the end of the world. That would generally take until about daybreak, I would nap until business hours, and then spend the day unloading as I worked my way back. I would generally get back in time to stop at school for my classes, then drive the truck home. My day was generally about thirty nine hours. I was doing this for about five dollars and hour. Those long days, when the truck was empty, and no longer balanced, I had to fight it down the mountain to home, my shoulders hurt so bad I would be on the edge of tears. The thing didn't have power steering, or AC or a radio. It was like being in solitary confinement, on the road. Those days, on overtime, the difference in my paycheck was two dollars an hour, after taxes.

I have lost count of the times that I pulled up to a store in the middle of no where, and found the only person inside was Grandma, who can't help unload. Then I was about two hundred fifteen pounds of muscle and bones, and would wrestle a sofa inside by myself.

Some of the places I have seen: Milwaukee NC, Yukon WV, Frog Level Va, Pumpkin Center NC, and last but not strangest, Bull Tail (population several). Now tell me I haven't been around. The three years I drove were some of the toughest I remember. Amazing as it sounds I still love it.

There is a lot of difference now, I go where I want, when I want. There is nothing like topping a hill, seeing the road ahead, run up through the gears, find the driving song that suits you the best, talk to another driver on the CB, and get on down the road.

Oh! Really?

You Should Be a Science Fiction Writer

Your ideas are very strange, and people often wonder what planet you're from.
And while you may have some problems being "normal," you'll have no problems writing sci-fi.
Whether it's epic films, important novels, or vivid comics...
Your own little universe could leave an important mark on the world!

Fair???? To Whom???

I just listened to John (mumbles) Kerry stumble and stammer through an explanation of the need for the fairness doctrine.
I am a little curious as to why economic forces can't do the job. When Air America went under it was after several people were found to have given them money that should have gone elsewhere. They couldn't get sponsors for their programing, in my opinion, due to the ranting and drivel of Mr. Franken. The content, or non content, if you prefer, didn't draw an audience.

That means they were so far left, that the left couldn't listen to them.

Now that’s bad I don't care who you are.

The market is the key, it is the people. If the people don't want to hear the junk, why try to force the media into delivering unwanted trash?

If there is no market, how will they force anyone to listen. If the intent is to be fair in the dissemination of information, then they will have to air something besides Democratic talking points and conspiracy theories.

So far that would be the only thing the Dems. don't complain about.

Conservative Talk shows are not, to the best of my knowledge, financed by public funds. National Public Radio, the bastion of liberal opinion, is publicly funded.

Does anyone think the government will decide to be fair and let conservative programing come to NPR? I'm thinking not.

All that is mildly interesting to me, only mildly.

The thing I find so hard to understand is the people have spoken, they want to hear conservative radio, if they wanted to listen to liberal spewing, they would. The politicos need to listen to the will of their constituants, and conduct themselves accordingly.

Why can't we let the market place determine the will of the people?

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Linky Love

Monkey Girl, dealing with the ER with humor and snark. read a few pages and know a good one when I see it.

NO!!!! means NO!!!!!

Strings over at Pirate With A Permission Slip posted the following.

Let me say here that the love of my life thinks it's endearing that I have the tendency to tear up at things concerning babies and sentimental love. I have to admit, she has never seen me with the devil in my eyes and hell open up with the blowers on. As God may have mercy on me for my errors, I am glad those events are few and far between. The rapist's, I have something for them, I promise they won't like it, but that would be the point wouldn't it? The Fool on the bench, because a judge should have some wisdom, and this one doesn't, should be subjected to the same treatment as the girl, to gain perspective.

No does, after all does mean no. The reason perverted psychotics restrain themselves is because they fear the pain of justice. No pain, no fear, do as you like and a few months in a free condo, and off you go.

As I said about my son-in-law, chop the ba$tard into little pieces and feed him to the cat, then abuse the cat turd.

From the "Whiskey Tango Foxtrot" files...
Got this via the Squeaky Wheel. I've already forwarded it on to the BACA Nation radio show, but I think I need to vent a bit on this...

from the article:

"A PEDOPHILE who raped a 10-year-old girl will be free in just four months after a British judge said his victim had "dressed provocatively"."

Ok, I have to say I've seen some VERY mature-looking kids. I have yet to see a 10 year old that looks of age, regardless of how she was dressed...

"In the latest case, Oxford Crown Court heard harrowing details of the assault on the 10-year-old. She was attacked in a park in South Oxfordshire by Fenn and his accomplice Darren Wright, 34, on October 14 last year.

Fenn removed all her clothes and raped her, then Wright took her to his home and sexually assaulted her."

So the one perv molested her, then the other took her home and continued the abuse?

I think I've got some rusty pinking shears somewhere around here...

"Yet Judge Hall said the case was exceptional because the "young woman" had been wearing a frilly bra and thong."

Ok... Squeaky Wheel already touched on this, but I think I want to emphasize: a ten-year-old does NOT, in any way, qualify as a "young woman". The term "woman" is usually used to describe someone who has started to physically develop: I've NEVER seen a ten-year-old who qualified. "Girl", or even "Little Girl" are the appropriate terms...

Also... at NO point should how someone is dressed be a qualifier to allow sexual assault. Period. Full stop. If a human of the female persuasion feels most comfortable walking around in nothing but revealing lingerie, that does NOT excuse some low-life forcing his sexual attentions on her...

"The court heard that the girl regularly wore make-up, strappy tops and jeans."

So? Half the girls I saw out today were wearing less: does that mean they're all "asking for it"? Give my five minutes with any scum that feels so, and acts on the presumed "invitation"...

"It is quite clear she is a very disturbed child and a very needy child and she is a sexually precocious child. She liked to dress provocatively," the judge said.

What the HELL does "sexually precocious" mean? Was she egging them on, ASKING them to molest her? Did she BEG the one to take her to his home, so he could continue the rape?

"Did she look like she was 10? Certainly not. She looked 16.""

Ok... I'm not sure of the laws in Britain. However, it's usually considered bad for a 24 year old to have relations with a 16 year old. And beyond the pale for a 34 year old to do so. Besides, I could've sworn the legal age of consent was 18 (or do they allow greater freedom earlier in England?)...

And then there's this gem:

"The same judge caused uproar earlier this year by setting free another paedophile and telling him to give his victim money "to buy a nice new bicycle"."

He not only (for all intents and purposes) ignored the victim's pain, he also ENCOURAGED further contact between the victim and his abuser? And THIS is supposed to be the "Guardian of Justice" in Britain?

I can't WAIT for my brothers and sisters back in the old country to get organized. Maybe they can help stem the tide of such insanity...

Sorry, I get a little insane, I have daughters and grand daughters, if it were them, God have mercy on all involved, I am unlikely to have any at all.

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Our Lords and Masters are at it again.

This link is to a web site with the list of twenty loop holes that will cost the taxpayers of this country BILLIONS. Our congress is ignoring our wishes and forcing this down our throats.

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?

Have any of you heard of this incident? I got it from a coworker of my wife.


Zoie, a family pet was shot by a neighbor in front of Zoie’s Mom and
kids. The husband, Zoe’s human dad, is presently stationed in Kuwait,
under Operation Iraqi Freedom. This family needs our help to get the
word out of what their neighbor has just done to their pet.

You’ll see part of the problem is that the Animal Control officer of
Bryon, who is related to the Mayor of Bryon won’t help, and is just as
cruel, see the article at
Dear Mrs. Mary Greene,

I am Walt Smisson and I am currently in the country of Kuwait working
with the US military and Operation Iraqi Freedom.

Yesterday (June 16th 2007), my neighbor, Mr. Jason Allman in an act of
insanity and barbarism lured my family’s pet husky puppy into his yard
and beat her with a claw hammer while my wife and children looked on in
horror and disbelief. He then fired his hand gun into her head while my
wife was trying to get to the puppy.

My wife was less than two feet away from the blast and my son a mere 10
feet. Other children were in the area not mention Mr. Allman’s own
children. The chances of that bullet not going toward the intended
direction was very high and could have lead to their death or other
neighbors enjoying their afternoon in the area. Mr. Allman may have in
fact fired into my property as well. We are looking at the property plat
and fence line.

He has been in court before for trapping and killing cats and other pets
in our neighborhood. The Byron City Police were summoned by a 911 call
but before they got there Mr. Allman made threats to my son and wife
while still brandishing the firearm and then he shot our very maimed pet
as she lay there crying for my wife to help her.

The police took Mr. Allman away to the Byron Jail but I suspect he will
get out today or tomorrow.

After all of this, members of his family moved their two trucks to their
back yard and pointed them toward our fence and residence and began
revving the engines as if they were going to plow through into our home
and dog lot. Both trucks are still here this morning. All of this was
captured on video tape from security cameras including the horrible
death of our puppy and the screams of family and the puppy can be heard.

It is a sick and disturbed person that does this type of thing and I
want everyone to know who he is, where he lives and to watch out for
these people. I am over here in the Middle East protecting you and our
country. Could you at least provide an inquiry to increase awareness and
provide a sense of protection from this beast for my family and

I think that if he gets out there will be an escalation in violence
toward my wife and children. I can't protect my family from over here
any other way. I need your help to ensure he is prosecuted as much as
the Georgia codes will allow. (felony cruelty to animals, reckless
endangerment to residents, discharging a firearm in a residential area,
terroristic threats, use of a firearm while committing a felony.) I hope
at least one of these will stick on his record. It is so hard to do my
job when I am worried about my loved ones back home.

My wife may be reached at and I will certainly answer any questions over
email or if you provide a phone number I will call you.
I just can’t believe that staying out of harms way over here may be
easier than at my own home in Byron, Georgia.

The Byron Police Department number is: (478) 956-2880 or (478) 256-3828.


Walton C. Smisson

Tough guy, bet he slaps babies and drowns little chickens too!
Spread it people, lets take this one viral!

Sunday, June 24, 2007

Yesterday I met aliens for the first time.

Not really, but it kind of feels that way. I had a request for a Concealed Carry Handgun class. Two of the participants were women who had never in their entire lives even touched a firearm. These ladies were not spring chickens, so their distance from the shooting sports was even more amazing.

That pitiful situation has been well, and truely remedied. We started with target .22's and worked our way through .380, 9mm, .45, and a few rounds of .44 mag.

All without a single snicker from the guys. They had a ball, and are ready to go again. Each earned their CCH Certificate, and a great deal of respect for being open minded and game.

This was one of the best classes I have had, best discussion, best test scores, and most fun for me.

I am coming to understand how much fear is in the lives of some people. One of the ladies threshold for an immediate deadly threat is very, very low. Thankfully she will never stick a gun in her pocket and go to town.

They don't even own a handgun.

New Day

Today is my birthday, I'm 55 today. All you young punks, remember you only hope to live as long as I have.

Thursday, June 21, 2007

They did what????

I was thinking about fishing stories today and remembered some of the high jinks at the boat ramp. In the summer you can get a cooler a lawn chair and a sunshade, go to the boat ramp morning or night, and see enough idiocy to cackle till you puke.

There is the odd boat dropped on the ramp, the forlorn looking fisherman as his pride and joy drifts away. Then there are the real wieners.

In the Seventies the Feds gave special status to South East Asian Refugees. No taxes, assistance with jobs, and that's just the beginning. The result was groups of tiny people who lived ten or so to a house, ate fish heads and rice, and saved every dime. They somehow found themselves with extra money and decided to move up in the world. The first purchase is of course a car, something big, in this case a Caprice. Then to save money on fish, a boat.

We all know catching fish to save money doesn't even pay for the gas. These hard working immigrants obviously felt differently.

The lakes around home were all fairly deep, as the hills around them were steep. The average might be fifty to sixty feet. The steep hills along the rivers also make for steep boat ramps. The brain trust in question showed up at the ramp with their car, boat and four or five adult men the size of children. They all got out and went to the ramp to survey the situation, all looked and pointed, they chattered like chipmunks on speed. Their expression, because we couldn't understand a word, sought Divine assistance. None was forthcoming. Finally after much debate, arm waving, and pointing, the lot of them went to the back of the car and unhooked the trailer.(?)

In my neck of the woods we try to mind our own business, but I like to think that if we could have understood their intent, some one would have intervened, but no one did.

Those miniature men proceeded to attempt to hand guide the trailer, and a thousand pound boat, down a thirty degree incline.

Brother, let me tell you, it went.....Like a bat released from the gates of hell, into the water and with momentum and the wind, right out into the channel and sank.

That will happen every time you leave the boat strapped to the trailer and the plug out.

Monday, June 18, 2007

Big Oily Dragon

I've been thinking about this for a while. It's not terribly complicated, so why has it taken me so long to put this before the public. Maybe no one wants to admit that they know when they are being screwed, and can't do anything about it.

The electrical production industry is a government regulated monopoly. That means we have no competition in our area, but we must perform in a reasonable, reliable, economical fashion. All our endeavors are auditable by the regulatory body. Electricity in the form of AC current can't be stored, the supply must meet the demand almost exactly. We can, and do cross the buy/sell line at the tie breakers every ten minuets. We analyze and schedule everything we do to ensure we can meet demand the year round. We can't have "shortages". If we have a lack of generation, your lights go out. Therefore we schedule our no production times so we can minimize our down time and try to limit it to periods when demand can be met by other means.

A like situation exists with the petroleum industry. They, like us, have large industrial complexes that require maintenance and upgrades on a regular basis. Therein lies the problem. This is known, or predictable, data. The industry KNOWS when demand will change from one product to another. They KNOW the equipment that will be required to be converted for different heating/fuel oils. All this can be scheduled and incentives put in place to ensure employee/ contractor efforts to keep the products flowing. Why is it not being done? One ready answer is a shortage drives prices up.

That’s right, if you do a poor job of predictive analysis, or just don't schedule anything, when the facility stops working, the price will go up.

The first thing that comes to mind is, if you are broke then you cant sell a product that you can't make. That's true, however, the shortage is a percentage of production, not a total halt.

The situation that comes to mind is the conspiracy theorists favorite, create a shortage, and reap the profits, keep the supply just below demand and keep the public conditioned to higher prices. I don't think any one can say we haven't been conditioned, when we look at any price below three dollars a gallon, and think it's a bargin.

If someone is creating a shortage, or doing some poor scheduling, put the word out and let some market forces go to work. I wouldn't buy from someone I know is trying to fleece me. I don't think there is collusion among CEO's in the petro world, but it's not impossible. I think if there were price fixing going on, someone would talk.

I think they just don't care, so they just let it break as it will. In my business there is a lot of discussion about "if it ain't broke, don't fix it." We call it a "fossil mentality". Really old school, we have learned the hard way to fix the important stuff when the unit is off line. If there is a culture of "run it 'till it breaks" then the additive equipment failures will add up to longer down times.

The point? There is nothing we do , that they can't do. Lets have some transparency and oversight of the petroleum industry.

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Beautiful Corpse?

Death through extreme sports

You are going to die in an extreme sports accident. You like to live life fast and hard. What’s the point if you don’t? Live fast, Die young, Leave a good looking corpse. Right?

Take this quiz at


You are The Hierophant

Divine Wisdom. Manifestation. Explanation. Teaching.

All things relating to education, patience, help from superiors.The Hierophant is often considered to be a Guardian Angel.

The Hierophant's purpose is to bring the spiritual down to Earth. Where the High Priestess between her two pillars deals with realms beyond this Earth, the Hierophant (or High Priest) deals with worldly problems. He is well suited to do this because he strives to create harmony and peace in the midst of a crisis. The Hierophant's only problem is that he can be stubborn and hidebound. At his best, he is wise and soothing, at his worst, he is an unbending traditionalist.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

An Apology

An Apology to both my readers, slow posting due to earning my keep. Have to keep the baby's mama in toys. Tomorrow is my day off this week. That would be two out of fifteen. Hard to keep the homestead up like that. Howsomeever when I think of how much they pay me for what I do, I giggle like a school girl. If your imagination can see me as an ogre school girl, you're close. (The last time I was ill because the company made me drive to a training class, I thought about forty eight cents a mile at seventy miles an hour plus forty eight dollars an hour. That comes out to eighty one dollars and sixty cents an hour. I smiled and felt much better.)I try to swear off the overtime but the outages just keep piling up.

I will try to do better, I promise.

I will have to build a computer and load it tomorrow, so I can ransom my laptop from the girls. I also have to get something sparkly for the love of my life. Ear rings to match her right hand diamond ring. What do you girls think?

I have lots more red neck stories, and fishing stories, and some Army stories. Well tomorrow starts at 0415, one more Margarita and off I go!

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Nature or nurture, or does it really matter?

In the continuing introduction to "Rednecks I have Known", (or is that Red Necks I have Knowed?) I will move on to one of the patriarchs of the clan. Dufus is the stepfather of my longtime friend. Killer, gambler, drunk, pedophile possibly, and all around dangerous man. Dangerous because he will never back down, unafraid or stupid, take your best guess. Considering he gets his butt whipped every time the rodeo starts, I know what I think.

Dufus is actually a very personable type, friendly to a fault, unless there is alcohol, or a dissenting opinion involved. Then, my suggestion would be to have your gun in hand, I don't know, nor care to find out how good he is. I do know he has killed five men, maimed three, and survived five years incarcerated at the age of sixty. It is interesting to note that he is the better of the mothers marriages.

He and his family have regular get togethers on weekends, and sit around to discuss who is going to jail next, or how they intend to lie their way out of some charge or other. My friend is always found sitting in a corner so no one can get behind him or approach unseen. He is one of the craziest people I know, and he's not comfortable.

I feel as though I have told you that these icons of their community are only interested in mayhem. Nothing could be further from the truth. They enjoy fishing, hunting, camping, and sports that they can bet on. Why a few years ago they completely fished out a trophy trout stream, with dynamite. Never missed a single fish.

The hunting, they need to be a little more careful, felons are not allowed to own guns. The solution to this really minor inconvenience is to have the women folk buy them for the boys to borrow. They don't read well, so sometimes they will forget when the season ended, or when it begins, or limits. For reasons known only to them, the Wildlife Officers are "out to get them", and silly as it seems actually enforce the game laws.

These are the folks who would rather pay a dollar for a beer than twenty five cents for a light bulb. If you get an education then you are "upity", or a know it all. Their education is mostly practical application of the law, from the receiving end.
The remainder was from Dufus, as an example of "proper manly behavior.

A few years ago I was teaching my Ex to shoot a hand gun. I had acquired a hand gun of the caliber she was required to qualify with and had it touched up for accuracy. I handed it to Dufus and asked him how he liked it. He inspected it and allowed it was pretty nice. Then, not to be out done, he pulled a two shot derringer out of a back pocket, and asked what I thought of it. I took it carefully, as there was no doubt it was loaded, and asked "How do you unload this thing?". He showed me and unloaded the weapon. I looked it over, and tried to cock it to try the trigger. The hammer wouldn't stay back, so I asked him "How do you cock it?". He watched me fiddle with the hammer for a second, then his face went slack in shock. His illegal concealed weapon, that he carried because he might need it, didn't work. You can trust me on this, the crowd he ran with, he was going to need it sooner or later.
In a hushed tone he said "I guess I need to take this back to the man I got it from."

Yep, reckon you should.

All of Dufus children, natural or by marriage, with one exception, are felons. The one who isn't,,,,, I have spent hours at a sitting talking him down off the ledge, so to speak. The only exception worked for his education, and made a success of teaching school.

So, did Dufus example, the environment, or something hard wired in their heads make these lazy ba$t@rds criminals?

I'm thinking we should cut them open and find out.

At least they wouldn't be in the gene pool.

Sunday, June 10, 2007

Neutron Pusher

PawPaw was writing about requal, I feel your pain brother. We requal seven weeks a year, generally there is a written test, and one week there are five Job Performance Measures that must be performed without error or omission. Additionally we must do computer based requal for radiation protection, security, emergency preparedness,hazmat shipping, that’s just part of it. Last time I looked there was four pages of stuff I get tested on, one task per line. We also have firefighter, first responder and confined space rescue.

There may be an end to it, I just haven't found it yet. Please remember, I don't have an NRC licence. That would be worse by orders of magnitude.

As it is I just have to learn about a Britannica worth of stuff.

It could be worse, it could be raining.

Friday, June 8, 2007

Linky Dinky Do

Check out these two, strings at Pirate With a Permission Slip, and Babs at Babs RN.

Cool folks, good writing, interesting perspectives. They are in the blog roll.


If this had been me, they would have to clean me off with a fire hose, before working the code!!

First you say it, then you do it!

Thursday, June 7, 2007

Post Graduate Redneck

I think all of us get a little blush around the collar sometimes. Then there are the outstanding types that LawDog calls "critters", always in trouble, always persecuted by the law, always have a case pending in court. I know this will come as a great shock, it's never their fault.

One such pillar of the community, a brother to a long time friend, has some interesting stats to his credit. Five deaths to his credit, that we know of. One of them his friend (?) and running buddy. One was the sheriff's cousin, that would be the only one that sent him to jail. A few unrelated traffic deaths and couple of unreported felonies, I guess those don't really count, no charges were filed.

He is the only person to "volunteer" for the Army at the direction of a judge, that I am personally aware of, though I have heard the rumors for years.

The critter in question had spent several interesting days before the bench of a judge in our county. This was several interesting episodes into a long rap sheet. The judge was rapidly losing patience with convoluted explanations that relied on everyone lying, except our critter, of course. The final straw of that haystack escapes me now, what matters is critter decides he has put up with all the ill treatment he is going to! He will strike back!

Not all of his extended family are criminals, just most of them, and those who are possessed of an IQ greater than a ground squirrel tell him that there are alarms on the court house. Not to be deterred our master crook decides he has taken enough $H!t from the judge and will return the favor. One dreary rainy night the brain trust jimmy's a door, goes to the court room that he knows so well, climbs to the judges bench, drops laundry, and assumes the position. The deputies are watching and turn the lights on just in time to reduce the charges to mearly breaking and entering.

The Judge is not amused, I expect everyone in the room was howling and holding their sides, but not his honor. The merciful judge, in an ineffective attempt to keep the buffoon out of the big house, gives the loon a choice. Army or jail, he chose Army.

Big surprise! What really startled everyone was he made E5 in two years. The thing that didn't surprise anyone was he killed some dude on a train in the Alps and threw him off the train in the winter.

The Judge hoped that a little discipline would straighten him out. It just gave him a little more experience and training. After coming home (packing a block of C4 he "found" somewhere) everyone sort of avoided stepping on his toes for a while. The explosives are in the land fill now (and no I didn't put them there). Some one at the bank made him mad a few years back and he was asking me to get him a LAW rocket. I never even asked why, I just made my excuses and left. Nothing good would come from that conversation.

I made the statement that education is where you find it. This critter found it while some irate male relatives of a local girl are trying to kill him when he is in his house. Discharging a weapon into an occupied dwelling being illegal in most places, critter called 911, and low and behold the law shows up and hauls the shooters away. These were young LEOs who didn't know critters address or their response might have been delayed.

He is shocked that he wasn't in another car, and realised that he could play victim and make out! The feline is out of the sack for sure, critter can now say or do almost anything and not get arrested. The law will even protect him! His next bout with education came when he,,,upset,,, a gentleman who swatted him across the bean with a piece of pipe. Close call there, the gentleman almost made the world a safer place.

He learned that if he can suck up the punishment, the other guy will have to support him! So far his calculations have kept him from pushing anyone so far as to kill him, I think it's just a matter of luck, eventually the deed will get done.

Why bring all this dreck up?

If the good Judge had put him in the big house sooner, several people would be alive today. Someone else may have waxed the folks in question, but we can't know. The provable fact is after five years in the pen for killing the sheriffs cousin,(a good shoot by the way, defending the life of a third party) he started to watch his ways and stay out of those positions that would have him bent over in the prison system.

Interestingly enough, the critter was my son's babysitter for a while, no one could have asked for a better or more faithful caregiver.

Go figure.

Wednesday, June 6, 2007

Critter dunking

When I was in the rescue business we were nondiscriminatory in our attentions. You call; we haul, day or night. If we like you or not. That’s the way it should be. We as a group would turn out for some of the most absurd goat roping you can imagine. A few calls turned into a comedy of errors the likes of which avoid explanation. I was talking to a coworker who knew one of our local critters and was reminded of this one.

He was the kind of dude who caused you to shake your head in amazement, why didn't someone just shake some sense into him? It might have kept him alive. This was the perp who would rather saw the cleat off your flag pole than go to the hardware store and buy one for a couple of bucks. Hassel old ladies and do anything on a dare so he couldn't be accused of being scared. Stupid, absolutely, no doubt at all, scared? Well, he did things that most people would shy away from if you paid them good money. The only thing certain is he won't do them again.

There is a bridge over the intercostal waterway that measures about 72 feet from the rail to the water, depending on the tide. The water is 24 feet deep, again depending on tide. The water in the intercostal is black; rather, it is stained with tannic acid so dark it looks black. If your dive light is strong enough, it will penetrate two or three feet.

The waters are alive and lively, lots of things are there to process any unattended protein. That means if you don't keep moving something will sidle over for a snack off your tender parts.

I eat blue crabs for revenge, it's only fair.

The critter in question was out working on a graduate degree in redneck, accruing points by the six-pack lot. Two of his cousins, also post graduate rednecks themselves, were helping him in his development. One of the cousins decided the thing to do was pay cousin to do something he wouldn't do himself. In this case it was dive off the bridge. Now the critter soon to be the object of our search had done this before, feet first. His cousins paid the fearless one, to dive head first from the bridge, the munificent sum of twenty dollars. The geniuses in question, supplied critter with tobacco and beer, then went to the marsh to watch the fearless one dive.

Let me pause here to point out that a little healthy fear will keep you out of the ED or morgue.

No Fear, indeed, more like no brains.

We later had a witness come forward to say she had seen him take a final sip of beer, a final drag on his cigarette, and stand with his hands over his head and then dive. If you ever watch dive competition, notice they look at the water until just before impact, then hit it head first. They are careful to ensure the surface is visible to the diver so they can judge the distance remaining. It's not possible at night, can't see black water in the dark. Critter was still looking at the water when he hit. He never surfaced.

The cousins in their panic, attempted to find critter, in the dark, in cold water, with the tide running. I am afraid the odds were against them. Actually they hadn’t a prayer, not that any of this bunch were likely to warm a pew.

The next obvious thing to do is call the squad. Let the games begin!!!!

The closest diver was an ex-con who would dive in the deepest most dangerous water around with out a buddy, the rescue truck shows up and he’s in the water in not much more than underwear and scuba gear. We had a half dozen or so qualified divers, some of those had actually done searches for victims, not the hero, his first time.

By himself, at night.

I got the call and arrived about twenty minutes into the circus, clown two on scene. The scene commander told me to get into gear as safety diver. Keep in mind, I am not fully certified yet. So, who will save who? I went to the back of the rescue truck and proceeded to put on my wetsuit and Scuba gear. The TV cameras and such were at the waters edge so I figured no one will notice the naked man in the dark.\

I should be so lucky.

When I was suited up and clanked around to the edge of the water the Chief asked me where I got dressed. I replied “the road back of the truck.” He looked a little stricken and informed me the family of the missing critter was sitting in the car behind where I stripped. Hope they enjoyed the show.

Our felonious diver surfaced and said “no way, too dark”. The Sheriffs team showed up and took over diving operations, God bless them. The lead was an ex-Seal friend of mine who is more at home underwater with explosives than most folks are on the bank with a beer. Karl described the bottom as covered with stumps and the water as dark as diving in your closet with the light off. I’ll take his word for it. He spent a couple of hours following crabs to see if they could find the critter, no luck there either.

The yacht club, as we called the folks who ran the water ambulance, were idling around with million candle power lights checking the edges of the marsh for the body. That would be until the lights killed the batteries and the engine died.

The Coast Guard was on scene, blocking the water way, while diving was in progress. They were gracious enough to come get the boat and ease us around to the nearest pier to charge the batteries. By this time the yacht club has gotten tired and gone home. I was never certified on the boat, a political thing, but I was good enough to do what ever, if they didn’t want to. So, guess who was at the helm? Right in one,,, me. I was treated to the most outstanding example of helmsman ship I have seen to date. The coxswain of Coast Guard 42366 could probably square dance with that hull, and never touch his partners toes.

Some time very late, the search was called until the morning. Then things really got interesting.

I was again running the rescue boat, the county emergency coordinator was there to manage the recovery operations, the TV crew was back, the family was on scene. The Sheriff came down to see what his boys were doing. All things considered we could have had a great party if there wasn’t a fatality involved.

We were sixteen hours into the efforts before the body was recovered.
In this part of the state we get our share of drowning. Because of this, the method of searching has progressed from dragging to shrimping. We use a small shrimp net with a tickler chain to pull around areas to net the bodies. Everyone wants to help and three or so nets can cover a large area. I was blocking the south access to the search area and got a call to come to the dock area. One of the nets had found the body and his arm was wrapped in the chain. We were in the process of getting critter untangled and into a basket to raise him into the boat when the breeze started to push us into the shore.

This is bad.

Remember earlier when I mentioned that crabs would sample your tender parts? Mr. Critter had been sampled. His ears, nose, lips, and some other parts were pretty well chewed. The other interesting sight was the foam coming out of his ears, nose and mouth. That is due to the salt water and rising from twenty or so feet under water.

Most unattractive.

This is always the point where some helpful idiot will show the family down to look at what the crabs have left of the recently departed. The family member in question was “little sister”. She was younger not smaller. Actually she could have played defense in the NFL. The sympathetic moron who was “helping” had on hand on her elbow, and his head barely came to her shoulder. I saw them approaching through a crowd of deputies. One of the other people with me looked up and called to the deputies to clear the pier. If little sis had gone down on the pier we would have been there all day getting her out. The good guys put them all on the hill.

The TV crew finally had what they had come for, a shot of the recovered body, hopefully gory, being dragged from the water. There was a problem. Little sis was standing in the way. The news reporter reached over and pushed little sis out of the shot and there you have it, I was on TV.

Little sis was not happy. She looked around, picked up a piece of four by four, and swung for the fence. The reporter was down for the count. Imagine a shocked silence, except for the sound of jaws dropping to creak in the breeze. Into this silence speaks a soft voice, “Sheriff what are you going to do if the reporter presses charges?” The Sheriff replies “Nothing, but if she presses charges, he’s going to jail.”

I love me that Sheriff!!

The rest is rather anticlimactic, take the critter to the morgue, clean all the equipment and try to write a report that keeps us from looking exceptionally stupid.

That’s the hard part.

Sunday, June 3, 2007

Well who'da thunk it?

Your results:
You are Worf

Mr. Scott
Will Riker
Jean-Luc Picard
Geordi LaForge
An Expendable Character (Redshirt)
Beverly Crusher
James T. Kirk (Captain)
Leonard McCoy (Bones)
Mr. Sulu
Deanna Troi
You are trained in the art of combat
and are usually intimidating.

Click here to take the Star Trek Personality Test

Beautiful and tasty too....

This is what they look like just out of the water, not the grey ugly things I showed earlier.

I know where to find Sumdood...

I have followed in the tracks, and heard rumors of Sumdood since my initiation into the Fire Service. He's the one that lures firefighters to risk their lives by being in a structure on fire and showing himself, then ducking out at superhuman speed, or as a puff of smoke. You always get a passerby who can testify " sumdood's in there, I seen 'im!!"

He's never trapped, or is it his inept accomplice, Datdood, ('at's Datdood whut done it!) through some perverse desire to see the truckees go nutzoid trying to save someone who isn't there, who has given false witness and then left the area so he can't be questioned.

You see I really want to help AD and Lawdog get rid of this menace to humanity and Emergency Services. Sumdood has been hanging out at the same place, or at least returning there consistantly for thirty years that I know of, and probably to the place of the same name, since there was such a place. I'm thinking that somewhere in the mists of time: Sumdood, Datdood and their girlfriends Abitch and Sumho, were bored and looking for laughs, they concocted many schemes to cause the world and it's inhabitants trouble.

Where is this place? It's "da corner"! You might think "there's lot's of corners. I am afraid, and saddened, to say it's only one corner, it moves around, but there is only one. It is the gathering place for the weekly meeting of the Knife and Gun Club. The members convene to show and tell of their most recent toys. Invariably blood is spilled, 911 is called, and Sumdood or Datdood, or their extended family has wrecked havoc,,,,,, and disappeared never to be seen again.

So, brothers in this most important quest, if you can predict where the next meeting of the Knife and Gun Club will be, Sumdood will likely be there. The algorithm for locating the next meeting is more complicated than predicting the next cylinder of the Enigma Machine.

Or is that the Knife and Club You meeting?