Sunday, June 3, 2007

I know where to find Sumdood...

I have followed in the tracks, and heard rumors of Sumdood since my initiation into the Fire Service. He's the one that lures firefighters to risk their lives by being in a structure on fire and showing himself, then ducking out at superhuman speed, or as a puff of smoke. You always get a passerby who can testify " sumdood's in there, I seen 'im!!"

He's never trapped, or is it his inept accomplice, Datdood, ('at's Datdood whut done it!) through some perverse desire to see the truckees go nutzoid trying to save someone who isn't there, who has given false witness and then left the area so he can't be questioned.

You see I really want to help AD and Lawdog get rid of this menace to humanity and Emergency Services. Sumdood has been hanging out at the same place, or at least returning there consistantly for thirty years that I know of, and probably to the place of the same name, since there was such a place. I'm thinking that somewhere in the mists of time: Sumdood, Datdood and their girlfriends Abitch and Sumho, were bored and looking for laughs, they concocted many schemes to cause the world and it's inhabitants trouble.

Where is this place? It's "da corner"! You might think "there's lot's of corners. I am afraid, and saddened, to say it's only one corner, it moves around, but there is only one. It is the gathering place for the weekly meeting of the Knife and Gun Club. The members convene to show and tell of their most recent toys. Invariably blood is spilled, 911 is called, and Sumdood or Datdood, or their extended family has wrecked havoc,,,,,, and disappeared never to be seen again.

So, brothers in this most important quest, if you can predict where the next meeting of the Knife and Gun Club will be, Sumdood will likely be there. The algorithm for locating the next meeting is more complicated than predicting the next cylinder of the Enigma Machine.

Or is that the Knife and Club You meeting?

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