Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Big City Wing and a Prayer

Just like every other EMS unit, we had the chance to do transports. Now, good old Stump Water General Hospital can deal with a lot of things, but sometimes it's just a good idea to send folks to the next larger facility.

The Regional Hospital and Valet Parking Lot has a cardiac wing. It's brand new and has some high powered doctors there. When a patient gets a little too aggravating we would carefully haul their mouthy butts to the big city, and drop them (not literally) at the Cardiac Wing and a Prayer. Problem solved.

On this particular day we had a large man with a whiny attitude and four IV pumps. If I am in bad enough shape that I need four IV's going at one time, I think I'll just shut up and do as I am told. Not this dude, complain non stop, I don't want to go there, I want to go home. I want this, I want that, we all want something.

A little silence would do me good about now.

You folks can deal with whiny boy I'm driving, how big of a hurry are we in?

Not much?

I Thought so.

Off we go on our relaxing little trip to the big city, whiney boy is nonstop complaining. By the time we got there we were ready to do a drive by and just roll him out the back. We can't, so we actually park, roll him through the ER and down to the Wing and a Prayer.

This new wing has a cool layout, the nurses station is in the center with all the rooms laid out like spokes on a wheel, with the monitors duplicated in the nurse’s desks. Every patient has his or her own nurse assigned for individual care. WOW!

We bring in whiney boy, move him to the bed, and start removing the IV pumps; he's still running off at the mouth. About the time I get really fed up, in the door cruises a lingerie model with two pumps in each hand.


I know what picture just popped into your perverted little mind, but no, she was wearing scrubs.

Long blond hair, blue eyes, beautiful skin, athletic figure, and a smile fit to give you sunburn. I never missed a beat, I told him, "All right killer, you drive back, I'm staying with her!" The poor dear wasn't expecting that, she turned so red she blushed to her wrists.

I had to drive back anyway.

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